Hundreds of shades of Pyaar

February 14, 2017

Wishing the readers a very happy Valentine’s Day with guest article by Shalan Lal

(Today on Valentine’s Day, love is in the air everywhere. Love of mushy messages; of roses and chocolates; of romance and togetherness. ‘Genre’-theorists hold that the concept of genre is not relevant for Indian films, as all our films are essentially musical romances. Thus, right from the beginning of the talkies we had love songs aplenty in our films. On Songs of Yore, I have explored some variants of love: New Theatres’ Prem’ which was deeply spiritual; the intelligent woman’s romance for the dunce etc. Its converse is the attraction women have for the ‘zulmi’ or ‘bedardi’.

The ‘bedardi balma’s in our songs are naughty and playful, but not mean or vicious. However, taking off from Subodh’s query as to why the women in our films find men with such negative qualities attractive, Shalan Lal explores the darker side of love based on domination by men over women in literature, arts and films. Her thesis may jolt you and you may find the narration discordant to the occasion, but her selection of songs is quite benign depicting love with many shades. Her research is as usual very exhaustive. I wish the readers a very happy Valentine’s Day with this befitting piece by Shalan Lal. Thank you Shalan.AK)

Pyar hua iqaraar huaThe Hindi word “Pyaar” evolved out of the Sanskrit word “Prem”, so says the “Hindi Shabd Saagar”, the mammoth Hindi word dictionary in many volumes, published by the Nagari Prachaarini Sabha of Varanasi in 1933. It has had many reprints, and revised editions. AK has written a wonderful post on “Prem” and called it New Theatres’ romance with Prem. And he has interpreted the songs of love by the New Theatres’ composers, lyricists, singers and actors who presented them as he said, “The New Theatres took love to entirely unexpected heights. It was not merely a matter of semantics that pyar, mohabbat, ishq, for them was Prem or Preet. It also denoted for them something deeply spiritual, other-worldly and supremely blissful.”

Very true indeed! I would further say that the New Theatres opened up the music to all, including the common and very poor people. Music was once a game for the rich to visit the “Jalsaaghar” and chuck out their wealth at the singers at their whims, or it was locked in the temples only to be listened by the upper crust.

I think this spirituality had something to do with the giant leap of RabindranathTagore into all areas of arts through not only his Geetanjali, but his collections of ragas and ragini from the Granth Saheb, Bengali folk songs, and his continuous wandering in all parts of India in search of musical ideas, before his achievements of both the Knighthood and Nobel prize for literature. Rabindra Sangeet by the time of the New Theatres became Bengali Sangeet. Hence higher level! Gurudeb’s giant shadow was felt in Bengal at that time which permeates even now.

The music of the New Theatres was very sweet and charmed people at all levels of the Indian subcontinent. Naushad in his diary Dastan-e-Naushad has written that for hours he would listen to the songs of the New Theatres films and would dream that one day he would compose songs like that. When he created the company called “Filmkar” and wrote the story for the film Deedar, he invited Nitin Bose to direct it with Bengali realism and give it the New Theatres look. See the similarity between Street Singer and Deedar.

I trust you have read AK’s post on The New Theatres’ romance with Prem published on May 29, 2011. If not, I would strongly advise the readers to read it. It is not just a post, but a sublime album of ten best love songs of the New Theatres with brimful of spiritualness.

Last few months my mind was occupied with what Subodh Agrawal said in his comment #49 on my post on Chhed chhad songs :

“After such a wonderful post on teasing songs I would request Ms Shalan Lal or AK to try a post on ‘cursing’ songs, in which our heroines lovingly call their men ‘zulmi’, ‘zalim’, ‘bedardi’, ‘dagabaaz’, ‘beimaan’, ‘bewafa’ etc. There can be an interesting discussion on why women, at least in our films, find men with such negative qualities attractive. Men, on the other hand, may have some preference for ‘loose’ women, but only for short term fun. They don’t fall in love with them – so say the pundits of Hindi cinema. I remember seeing a statement from the actress Huma Qureshi dismissing good, decent men as uninteresting.”

So, in this post I thought I could bring in that discussion as well. So when this was cooking in my head at various intervals and looking for the material, theories and psychology of women my first thought went to the Feminist theories about women in man’s world. I had read the prime books on feminism when in the seventies bra-burning movement became a very prominent symbol of women’s anger.

Second Sex by Simone de Beauvoir (1949) is a major work of feminist philosophy. The book is a survey of the treatment of women throughout history. In The Female Eunuch, the author Germaine Greer (1970), who was a professor of English literature, made the argument that women have been cut off from their sexuality through a notion of the ‘normal’ woman, conceived by male dominated consumer society. The Beauty Myth by Naomi Wolf (1990) explores “normative standards of beauty” which undermine women politically and psychologically and are propagated by the fashion, beauty, and advertising industries.

Commonly, the feminist theory is that since the uncivilized days of humanity, man dominated woman and subdued her, and treated as his estate and property. Women lost their independent thinking; they had to guess the situation and talk in such a way that they would not upset men and their world.

So, in the open, the women would use the words in such a way that they would not hurt man or man’s world. One may find that once women are married and know their men, and if the men are not brutal, they might express freely.

So the words like ‘zulmi’, ‘zalim’, ‘bedardi’, ‘dagabaaz’, ‘beimaan’, ‘bewafa’ etc. will not be what they mean, as in the following songs:

ज़ुल्मी संग आँख लड़ी (Madhumati 1958),
मुहब्बत ही न जो समझे, वो ज़ालिम प्यार क्या जाने  (Parchhain  1952)
बेदर्दी बालमा तुझको मेरा मन याद करता है ( Aarzoo 1965)
ना मानूँ ना मानूँ ना मानूँ रे दगाबाज तोरी बतियाँ ना मानूँ रे (Ganga Jamuna 1961)
बेइमान तोरे नैनवा नींदिया ना आये (Tarana 1951),
इक बेवफ़ा से प्यार किया (Awara 1951) etc.

A father often tells his child, who is creating riot in the house by running around or breaking things, “Tu bada badmash aur shaitan banta ja raha hai”. Here the father really does not mean that his son is a bad boy.

The above words could mean what a politician said, “Out there, there are really many very bad men! These men are of twisted mind and would cause calamities to both men and women.””

That was my thinking and I wanted to develop this idea further.

But on a visit to our local library I saw a book on display called Fifty Shades of Grey by a British author E.L.James, published in 2011.

After reading it I was stunned and regretted that I should have ever read it. The book is as erotic as the sculptures on the temple of Khajurao and Konark. But as these pictures are in words they rant deep in you more than the words of Kamsutra or the visuals of Konark. For weeks I was restless.

The book tells a story of deepening relationship between a Washington State University fresher girl student called Anastasia Steele, and a young business magnate, Christian Grey. The explicit words present the sexual practices called “BDSSM”; in other words “Bondage, Dominance, Submission, Sadism and Masochism. There is a pun on the name “Grey” as well which means a topic that is not clearly one thing or the other, but is open to different interpretations.

The book was rejected by many publishers so it was published as an e-Book. Then it suddenly became famous and got printed and within two years 125 million copies were sold around the world. The author went on further writing two more books and now it is known as Shades Trilogy. It also was turned into a film.

The feminist groups always protest against the pornographic art, film, literatures etc. as these create violence against women and man remains in a culture that uses women as sexual objects. In spite of this, the trilogy has been translated into more than fifty world languages. So I wonder if there is a faint shade of truth in the statement of Subodh Agrawal that wickedness of man is attractive to women.

The explicit erotic scenes and practice in the Brando film Last Tango in Paris, 1973 became famous for a long time as the film’s raw portrayal of sexual violence and emotional turmoil led to international controversy at various levels.

Marlon Brando reached a high pinnacle of acting with his film On the Waterfront, 1954. His support for the plight of the American Indians made him extremely respected. After his work in the film On the Waterfront, he could be a candidate for the American Presidential election any time he wanted to enter into politics. He created high expectation. However, the sexually explicit scenes in his The Last Tango in Paris (1972), a film about a perverted and depraved man, quashed any possibility of attempt at high office. The man who once owned an island, had to spend his last years of life in poverty, worsened by the tragedy of his daughter’s suicide and the killing of her boyfriend by her own brother.

imageimageThe early films of silent era of Rudolph Valentino overtly showed the dominance of the hero and submission of the heroines in his films. He was handsome; the media called him “Latin Lover” and his films were more popular among the female than male audiences.

He made Latin American Argentine dance, Tango – originally a gaucho dance in his film The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse (1921) – a very sexy experience, adding ruthless dominance. Ever since, this dance in the ballroom dance competitions has become more wicked than the original gaucho dance. The effect of this dance on women made them swoon and accept submission to the dancer.

His further acting as an Arab Sheik in the films like The Sheik (1921), Blood and Sand (1922), The Eagle (1925) and The Son of the Sheik (1926) showed him as a ruthless Arab using dominance and submission. This became a controversial topic in the media. He had to tell the media that “the Arabs are very good people and they have very ancient civilization.”

In the British Navy there was a regular practice of whipping naval miscreant sailors to bring them down to submission. All film and stage versions of the story of “Mutiny on the Bounty” show the whipping of the naval rating.

imageIn literature we have many similar novels written in English and French during the tail end of the Victorian era. Many were banned but reprinted in eighties. The novels of James Hadley Chase have both criminal elements and neurotic sexism. His first novel called No Orchids for Miss Blandish, published in 1939, created huge hue and cry in the reading public.

The novel still creates sensation. The novels of Chase were very popular during fifties and all through sixties. Nargis used to read them. There are elements of the Miss Blandish novel in the film Mujhe Jeene Do. In Hollywood, this novel has inspired many film versions, including one by the same name.

The story is centred around an heiress Miss Blandish with her husband on the honeymoon being kidnapped by a family of gangsters. They killed her husband and took her for the half-witted and very cruel son of the gangster leader called Ma Grison. While the police and the millionaire go chasing and looking for the gangsters, Miss Blandish has been treated very badly and dominance and submission were used. At the end the police find the gangsters and kill all of them except the half-witted son who had been protected by Miss Blandish. Her father asked her why she did it. She answered that she had fallen in love with him.

Now the chicken have come to roost for the portion of the line in Subodh Agrawal’s statement “why women, at least in our films, find men with such negative qualities attractive.”

When in my school days I read it I was very much disturbed. I was grown up reading religious books like Ramayan and Mahabharat and our family was Vaishnavaite. In spite of Ravan kidnapping Sita and frightening her with terror, she remained faithful to Ram and this made her a “Sati”, i.e. a “chaste” woman. And this became a natural moral code for all women.

Most of the books of Chase deal in criminal subjects with pervert and depraved characters in graphic word pictures. Many of the novels are based on true incidents. Most of them have North American locations. Surprisingly, before writing his book No Orchids for Miss Blandish, Chase did not go to the U.S.A. Later he made two brief trips but he had thorough knowledge of America and American dream.

The English novel forms started with the novels of the Bronte Sisters’ works and of Jane Austen who had in their books characters possessed by dominance and demanded submission from around. The hero of Charlotte Bronte’s Jane Eyre had dominance trend. This novel had some influence on the film Sangdil of Dilip Kumar and Madhubala. Think of the title Sangdil! The novel Wuthering Heights of Emily Bronte has depiction of mental and physical cruelty and there is plenty of Dominance and Submission in the main characters. In some parts, this book cast influence on the film Hulchul of Dilip Kumar and NaKate Bushrgis. This book was called “A fiend of a book, an incredible monster” by the Victorian influential poet and painter Dante Gabriel Rossetti. In the seventies, a young singer Kate Bush wrote the lyric and melody and presented it in a unique dance. Her song was on the top of the pop for one year. The song was called Wuthering Heights. The song tells the story of a girl and her passion for the dominating man as it is in the book Wuthering Heights.

Lyric of the Wuthering Heights

Out on the Wiley, Windy Moors
We’d roll and fall in green
You had a temper like my jealousy
Too hot, too greedy
How could you leave me
When I needed to possess you?
I hated you, I loved you, too

Bad dreams in the night
They told me I was going to lose the fight
Leave behind my Wuthering, Wuthering
Wuthering Heights

Heathcliff, it’s me, Cathy
Come home, I’m so cold!
Let me in-a-your window

Heathcliff, it’s me, Cathy
Come home, I’m so cold!
Let me in-a-your window

Ooh, it gets dark, it gets lonely
On the other side from you
I pine a lot, I find the lot
Falls through without you
I’m coming back, love
Cruel Heathcliff, my one dream
My only master

Too long I roam in the night
I’m coming back to his side, to put it right
I’m coming home to Wuthering, Wuthering, Wuthering Heights…

The Lady Chatterley’s Lover by the poet, novelist and essayist D.H. Lawrence was published in 1928 in Italy, but banned in England and India and then it was republished in 1960 by the Penguin Books. This novel has explicit sexual scenes and the main character has deployed dominance and submission practice. This was made into many film-versions and television series. The trial of the Penguins Books became famous and also was dramatised. There was a separate trial in Bombay as well.

UntitledOther literatures that dominated films were the books of Mary Shelly and Lord Byron. Percy Shelly, Mary Shelly, Lord Byron and his doctor John Polidori all went to live in Geneva by the Lake Geneva. Byron rented a house for all to live. They did a lot of sight-seeing while going there. One day it rained all day and night. They decided to have a competition of writing a frightening horror story. They all talked about many things. At that time electricity had been just invented and many thought the electricity could be used for many things etc. None of them could think of anything interesting that would become horror story.

One night Shelly dreamt that a dead man became alive by the shocks of electricity. He wrote a small draft about it and gave it to Mary to develop it. Lord Byron too wrote a small plot about a Count whose grave he saw in his early trip to Greece on the way through Czechoslovakia. On the grave was written “Vampire – the undead”.

Then Mary Shelly completed the story of Frankenstein. And Dr. Polidori completed the story of the vampire. During the Victorian times both the stories came on the stage as plays and became very popular. In the silent era, the story was adapted into many film versions. Both the stories have dominance and submission and suppressed sexual depravity.

The third in the above was a novel written by George du Maurier’s Trilby which whipped up a worldwide storm. Du Maurier was Paris-born of a very illustrious French family. He learnt English and came to live in London. He was a cartoonist and learnt to sing operatic songs. He was appointed as cartoonist by the famous Punch Magazine. In Trilby there was a character called “Svengali” who could hypnotize and spellbind women with the power of his eyes. His novel was put on the stage along with those of the Frankenstein, Vampire and other murderous stories like Red Riding Hood in which women were brought into submission by the dominance. These novels became founding fodder for the early silent films and through them they came to India as well.

Prabhat Company had a Kashmiri actor Chandramohan who acted in the film called Amrit Manthan 1934 with Svengali eyes and Shantaram used them very much. In the film King of Ayodhya (1932), Baburao Pendharkar as a villain used special technique to create cruelty in his image, borrowed from the early Hollywood silent films.

So in literature, on stage and in films there were villains with hidden and repressed sex using dominance and submission of their women victims. This does not mean that India’s past did not have wicked men in their ancient stories. Kans in Krishna stories was very twisted minded, who killed his own sister’s babies. Ravan in Ramayan raped his own elder brother Kuber’s wife and stole Kuber’s Pushpak plane. He kidnapped Sita, perhaps the first in the ancient Indian civilization. Mahabharat had depraved characters like Duryodhan and Dushasan. Ashvathama became the most wicked character who killed Pandava women’s babies in the wombs.

A new trend has started on the British stage. The women are presenting Shakespeare’s plays, acted and directed by women and interpreting the meaning of the plays differently. Twenty years ago, I saw an all-women’s play interpretation of the Taming of the Shrew of Shakespeare. The heroine Kate is brought to her knees by her husband by submission so much that she becomes broken and mentally ill. The play became hugely famous and showed the cruelty of men against the women.

The main plot depicts the courtship of Petruchio and Katherina, the headstrong, obdurate shrew. Initially, Katherina is an unwilling participant in the relationship, but Petruchio tempers her with various psychological torments – the “taming” – until she becomes a compliant and obedient bride. The subplot features a competition between the suitors of Katherina’s more desirable sister, Bianca. The play’s allegedly misogynistic elements have become the subject of considerable controversy, particularly among modern scholars, audiences and readers. There is a musical film “Kiss Me Kate” based on the above play and music is by Cole Porter. The version of Richard Burton and Elizabeth is available on the YouTube.

In the subplot of the play, Bianca, the good younger sister of Kate, is wooed by her two suitors who enter the house by changing names and putting on fake beards etc. because her father wanted Kate to be married first. In Hindi cinema the fake changing of person has been used many times and it comes from this play.

In real life, during the Victorian time many men had double standards and depressed sexual practices. Many of top the ranking politicians in the Independence movement and later as rulers had double standards as well in India.

I think this discussion is more than enough about all those words “zulmi’, ‘zalim’, ‘bedardi’, ‘dagabaaz’ etc and their depraved activities! But one should know in the light of the book Fifty Shades of Grey, and in the Freudian language everything boils down to love and sex.

So these are the dark shades and not grey. In the English language the word “grey” means that area which has shady or untouched area.

Now I want to walk away from the above grey and grave subject and enjoy something nice, sweet and dreamy; something may not be real but wished it would be real syrupy, sweet, chocolaty and dreamy.

The answer is Hindi songs with Pyar theme! And I try to find the colour or shade in them. Pyaar songs with capricious and variable shades are drawn from their inner souls. The songs carry shades at the behest of the singers’ voices or composers lilt and tilt or lyricists own idea or need of the situation in the film, director’s need to illustrate his skill etc. I am choosing only ten songs and explaining the various shades they carry. Hindi films had love songs in them ever since the talkies started, so there are thousands of songs of Pyaar in the Bollywood. I also would like to invite the readers to find the shades in the songs of Pyaar they like and draw those shades out for all to share.

The first song I chose is a private song by Jagmohan the “Sursagar”. Jagmohan has a natural Hindu temple singer’s voice and it comes out in most of his songs. He was born in 1918 and next year will be his centenary. The famous encyclopaedic Mr Arunkumar Deshmukh has written an authoritative article on Jagmohan Sursagar in the blog “Atul-a-song –a day”. I recommend readers to read it. I hope Mr Arunkumar Deshmukh brings out a book on this divine singer during his centenary year. Jagmohan was a pupil of the famous writer and singer Dilip Kumar Roy who lived in Pondicherry. He was a spiritualist. In this song Sursagar presents the shade of mysticism of love and brings out it in very simple

1. Dil ko hai tumse pyaar kyun by Jagmohan Sursagar (1945), lyrics Fayyaz Hashmi, music Kamal Dasgupta.

The singer wonders why he fell for a girl when there was no dearth of beauties in the world and why she suddenly came and lived in his eyes and heart? The women are as much prone to fall for this kind of unexplained love: Mujhe kisi se pyaar ho gaya in Barsaat (1949).

Jagmohan composed music for only one film: Sardar (1955). There is a wonderful song in the voice of Lata in the film, प्यार की ये तल्ख़ियाँ, जो न सह सकूं तो मैं क्या करूं, lyric by Kaif Irfani. I would have chosen this song but I wanted to start with something spiritual as I was sick of the wicked people and their dark-shaded loved affairs. Jagmohan had wild streak in his musical creativity. In Sardar he composed a song, बरखा की रात में हे हो हा in the luscious voice of Geeta Dutt, that would rock listeners’ hearts. It is. The lyric was composed by Uddhav Kumar. I wonder who this fellow is.

(The video below is the uploader’s creativity in synchronising it on Dilip Kumar and Madhubala. – AK)

The second song I choose is from the film Jaan Pahchaan (1950).

2. Hum kya batayen tumse, kyon door ho gaye hain by Shankar Dasgupta from Jaan Pehchan (1950), lyrics Shakeel Badayuni, music Khemchand Prakash

The song has a thick shadow of the song number one Dil ko hai tumse pyaar kyun, and there is a shade of composition of Kamal Dasgupta as well. The voice has some streaks of Jagmohan, too. However, the construction of the tune with music by Khemchand Prakash is very rich and haunting in parts.

Raj Kapoor and Nargis starred in the film. This film was directed by Fali Mistri and is rich with photography and stagecraft. The success of Barsaat was fresh with them. This song melted in the overall nature of the film. Raj Kapoor did good presentation of this song of helplessness and he conveyed the feeling that he was quite unable to tell Nargis who probably would take it wrongly. At places Shankar Dasgupta’s voice is very haunting with a feeling of emptiness, and the music goes with it. So the shade here is of helplessness in love.

Raj later on said many times that Mukesh was his voice. But he did not stay imprisoned in it. He had many good singers to illustrate his acting better than just in the voice of Mukesh.

My third choice is in the line of the above voices. It is Manna Dey who was a nephew of Krishna Chadra Dey and learnt his art of singing at his feet. He came to Bombay as early as in 1943 and gave voice to the male songs in the famous film, Ram Rajya of Bhatta Brothers. Prem Adib and Shabhana Samarth acted as Ram and Sita. But my choice is this song from the film Seema (1955), picturised on Balaraj Sahni.

3. Tu pyaar ka sagar hai by Manna Dey from Seema (1955), lyrics Shailendra, music Shankar-Jaikishan

The song is in bhajan format and has chorus joining in. Balaraj Sahni plays the role of the head of a reform house for the girls. He has been unable to reform Nutan who is a runaway from her torture and exploitation in the house of her distant relatives. He himself is troubled by the heart aches. He is about to die. Some verses from the lyric:

तू प्यार का सागर है
तेरी इक बूँद के प्यासे हम
लौटा जो दिया तुमने, चले जायेंगे जहाँ से हम
तू प्यार का सागर है …

घायल मन का, पागल पंछी उड़ने को बेक़रार
पंख हैं कोमल, आँख है धुँधली, जाना है सागर पार
जाना है सागर पार
अब तू ही इसे समझा, राह भूले थे कहाँ से हम
तू प्यार का सागर है …

Shailendra grew up in Mathura. Words pregnant with meanings came to him easily. The intensity of the character that Balaraj is playing comes out and Manna Dey brings it out to us easily in his devotional voice. The song has helplessness of man when the worries are surmounting. The song straightens up the character of Nutan but sadly the character of Blaraj departs from the early world. The song is easy for the common people to hum, sing and join in.

Here ends my spiritual journey and purging out the sin of reading the book Fifty Shades of Grey.

Now I want to present some jolly and jaunty songs. And I choose a song of Kishore Kumar. It looks somehow I am staying on the Bengali side of the singers. But to call Kishore Kumar a Bengali is too much restriction and regimentation of a frame for such a rebellious soul!

4. Hum to mohabbat karega by Kishore Kumar from Dilli Ka Thug (1958), lyrics Majrooh Sultanpuri, music Ravi

हम तो मोहब्बत करेगा
दुनिया से नहीं डरेगा
चाहे ये ज़माना कहे हमको दीवाना
अजी हम तो मोहब्बत करेगा

चुपके से आप तो दिल लेके चले जाते हैं
पीछे पीछे दीवाने फिर भी चले आते हैं
(मेरी जूती से )
जूता पोलिश करेगा लेकिन तुम पे मरेगा
चाहे ये ज़माना कहे हमको दीवाना अजी हम तो मोहब्बत करेगा

ठोकर से और भी अरमान ये, जवान होते हैं
दुनिया में हम जैसे आशिक़ भी कहाँ होते हैं
(अरे वाह रे मजनू)
लैला लैला करेगा ठंडी आहें भरेगा
चाहे ये ज़माना कहे हमको दीवाना अजी हम तो मोहब्बत करेगा

दूर हो होके अजी, यूँ न सताओ हमको
हम जीयें कैसे भला ये तो बताओ हमको
(डूब मरो)
डूबेगा नहीं तरेगा प्यार से नहीं डरेगा
चाहे ये ज़माना कहे हमको दीवाना अजी हम तो मोहब्बत करेगा

The song is full of “Hasya Ras.” The song gives the shade how far a man in love would go.

My fifth choice is in the voice of Ram Dulari, Tum jaavo jaavo Bhagwan bane, from the film Chitralekha (1941), music by Jhande Khan. C.Ramchandra remembered him as the one who had a “raag” on the tip of his tongue when a lyric was suggested to him. Here the lyric is by Kidar Sharma who produced, wrote and directed this film which is available on YouTube. The film earned top revenue in 1941.

5. Tum jaavo jaavo Bhagwan bane by Ramdulari from Chitralekha (1941), lyrics Kidar Sharma, music Jhande Khan

तुम जावो-जावो भगवान बने -२
इनसान बनो तो जानें -२
तुम जावो-जावो भगवान बने –२

तुम उनके जो तुमको ध्यायें -२
जो नाम रटें मुक्ति पायें -२
हम पाप करें और दूर रहें -२
तुम पार करो तो मानें -२
तुम जावो बड़े भगवान बने –२

तुम उनके जो तुमको ध्यायें
जो नाम रटें मुक्ति पायें
हम पाप करें और दूर रहें
तुम पार करो तो मानें
तुम जावो बड़े भगवान बने –२

I want to mention that the voice and lyric of 1941 version is close to the character in the film, while the lyric of the 1964 version has the seal and voice of Sahir Ludhiyani. However, it is superb poetry. Lata’s voice is mint and in raagdari but Meena Kumari is not convincing. There is a slight anger in Ram Dulari’s voice as being labelled as “Paapi”. Women as “paapi” has been mentioned in the Bhagvat Geeta chapter nine verse 32:

clip_image002 9.32

Māṃ hĭ Pārthă vyăpāśhrĭtyă ye-ăpĭ syŭḥ pāpăyonăyăḥ
Strĭyo vaishyāstăthā shūdrāste-ăpĭ yāntĭ părāṃ gătĭm 9.32

Those who surrender to my ways, the wombs of offences
Women, businessmen and the servants, all are liberated! 9.32

English translation is by the English poet and Geeta scholar “Sasha Dee”.

Sahir’s idea (ये पाप है क्या ये पुण्य है क्या रीतों पर धर्म की मोहरें हैं) comes from Marxists view of the religion.

5A. Sansaar se bhaage phirate ho by Lata Mangeshkar from Chitralekha (1964), lyrics Sahir Ludhiyanavi, music Roshan

सन्सार से भागे फिरते हो
भगवान को तुम क्या पाओगे
इस लोग को भी अपना ना सके
उस लोक में भी पछताओगे
सन्सार से भागे फिरते हो

( ये पाप है क्या ये पुण्य है क्या
रीतों पर धर्म की मोहरें हैं ) -२
रीतों पर धर्म की मोहरें हैं
हर युग में बदलते धर्मों को
कैसे आदर्श बनाओगे
सन्सार से भागे फिरते हो

( ये भोग भी एक तपस्या है
तुम त्याग के मारे क्या जानो ) -२
तुम त्याग के मारे क्या जानो
अपमान रचेता का होगा
रचना को अगर ठुकराओगे
सन्सार से भागे फिरते हो

( हम कहते हैं ये जग अपना है
तुम कहते हो झूठा सपना है ) -२
तुम कहते हो झूठा सपना है
हम जनम बिता कर जायेंगे
तुम जनम गँवा कर जाओगे
सन्सार से भागे फिरते हो
भगवान को तुम क्या पाओगे
सन्सार से भागे फिरते हो

The sixth song I chose is from the film Shaheed (1948). It is in the voice of Lalita Deulkar and composed by the daddy of the Indian film music directors, Ghulam Haider.

Lalita sang Marathi songs and later on married the music director Sudhir Phadake and accepted the domesticity of life destined for most of the women. In Marathi language there is a saying “Chul and Mul” meaning the life of a woman is around “Chulha and Children”.

She had a very sweet voice and it could be moulded into the acting voice of the character. She sang for C.Ramchandra and other music directors in the forties and a little bit of the fifties.

Here is the song number 6.

6. Bachapan ki yaad dheere dheere pyaar ban gayi by Lalita Deulkar from Shaheed (1948), lyrics Qamar Jalalabadi, music Ghulam Haider

बचपन की याद धीरे धीरे प्यार बन गयी
आ देख एक फुलवारी अब गुलज़ार बन गयी

दिल में मोहब्बत आयी जवानी के साथ साथ
मेरी दिल की नगरी प्यार का संसार बन गयी
आ देख एक फुलवारी …

दुनिया से जिसको हम ने छिपाया था बार बार
वो बात आके होंठों पर इक़रार बन गयी
आ देख एक फुलवारी …

Kamini Kaushal acts out the song when she realizes that the visitor Dilip Kumar is her childhood friend. The lyricist Qamar Jalabadi presented subtle nuances of the shades of love flowering into a garden.

Dilip Kumar started a love affair with Kamini Kaushal. Together they acted in four films Arzoo, Nadiya Ke Paar and Shabanam were the other three films. Sadly, the Punjabi custom made her marry her elder sister’s husband when she died. It took a long time for Dilip Kumar to recover from the affair.

My next choice of the song is from the film Amar Jyoti (1936) of Prabhat films directed by Shantaram. The film is about the female pirates and villainous men.

Shataram was way ahead of many social thinkers, politicians and also the writers. His earlier film “Wahan” had all female characters and was based on an island ruled by women. Shanta Apte in Shantaram’s films rose to sensational heights. She was always presented as a rebel woman, like in the film Duniya Na Maane. She was a very good light classical singer. In later life she gave concerts of her songs in the films and also from the Marathi stage. She was controlled by her elder brother Baburao who used the BDSSM technique to seduce her. Off from the public eye she had a very sad life from which she could not rebel out. She was often locked in all day. This statement is made after seeing the Marathi play called “ Kahacheacha Chandra”, The Glass Moon, based on her life. There is very little writing about her. Baburao Patel who created and edited “filmindia” wrote something ill about her. Shanta Apte went into his office and caned him in front of his staff. So is the legend. But Baburao published her full colour picture in one of the forties issues of filmindia. She left one daughter who acted on the stage and in the films.

7. Ab maine jana hai haay prem kya hai by Shanta Apte from Amar Jyoti (1936), lyrics Pandit Narottam Vyas, music Master Krishna Rao.

There are top stars in the film like Chandramohan, Mandrake, Durga Khote etc.

अब मैंने जाना है, हाय प्रेम क्या है

हम अगर जानते कि इश्क़ दर्द देता है
तो भला किस लिये इस मर्ज़ का सौदा करते

प्रेम बना अब दिल की बेड़ी, जो ज़ेवर माना है
इश्क़ और दिल हिलमिल के दोस्ती में एक हुए
दिल से गर इश्क़ निकाले तो दिल भी जाता है

This song reminds me of the song in the film Jailor, “Hum pyaar mein jalnewaalon ko chain kahan araam kahan”. But my efforts are to avoid Lata as much as possible.

The song number 8 is from the film “Sone Ki Chidiya” 1958.

8. Pyaar par bas to nahin hai mera, lekin phir bhi by Talat Mahmood and Asha Bhosle from Sone Ki Chidiya (1958), lyricsy Sahir Ludhiyanavi, music O.P. Nayyar

प्यार पर बस तो नहीं है मेरा, लेकिन फिर भी
तू बता दे के तुझे प्यार करूँ या ना करूँ

मेरे ख़्वाबों के झरोखों को सजाने वाली
तेरे ख़्वाबों में कहीं मेरा गुज़र है के नहीं
पूछ कर अपनी निगाहों से बता दे मुझको
मेरी रातों के मुक़द्दर में सहर है के नहीं
प्यार पर बस तो नहीं है …

कहीं ऐसा न हो पाओं मेरे थर्रा जाएं
और तेरी मरमरी बाहों का सहारा न मिले
अश्क बहते रहे खमोश सियाह रातों में
और तेरे रेशमी आंचल का किनारा न मिले
प्यार पर बस तो नहीं है …

The song is sung in the velvety vibrato voice by Talat. The lyric creates the image that person who is appealing to a woman has sincerity of his feelings and gentleness in non-committal appeal to the woman he loves. He also explains his depth of the feeling of his love. The song is picturised on Talat himself as one of the many men Nutan meets. And sadly the character of Talat proves that he is neither in love with her, nor sincere, but one of the many men to exploit her for his purpose. Very true!

The song has Asha’s wordless sound accompaniment. Some think that it is O.P. Nayyer’s contribution. But the film Paying Guest (1957), music by S.D.Burman, the song O Nigahe Mastana has similar wordless accompaniment of sound in Asha’s voice.

The song number 9 is in Suraiya’s voice from the film Rustum Soharab (1963). I debated for a long time to make a choice between many songs of Suraiya and eventually I settled for this one.

9. Yeh kaisi ajab dastan ho gayi hai by Suraiya from Rustom Sohrab (1963), lyrics Qmar Jalalbadi, music Sajjad Husain

(ये कैसी अजब दास्ताँ हो गई है
छुपाते छुपाते बयाँ हो गई है) – २
ये कैसी…

ये दिल का धड़कना, ये नज़रों का झुकना
जिगर में जलन सी ये साँसों का रुकना
ख़ुदा जाने क्या दास्ताँ हो गई है
छुपाते छुपाते बयाँ हो गई है
ये कैसी….

बुझा दो बुझा दो, बुझा दो सितारों की शम्में बुझा दो
छुपा दो छुपा दो, छुपा दो हसीं चाँद को भी छुपा दो
यहाँ रौशनी महमाँ हो गई है
आअ~
ये कैसी….

इलाही ये तूफ़ान है किस बला का
कि हाथों से छुटा है दामन हया का
(ख़ुदा की क़सम आज दिल कह रहा है) – २
कि लुट जाऊँ मैं नाम लेकर वफ़ा का
तमन्ना तड़प कर जवाँ हो गई है
आआ~
ये कैसी….
छुपाते छुपाते…..

The lyric writer has expressed so well that any praise for his poetry and lyricism will be small for this creation. Sajjad is a temperamental composer! Legned has it that he named his dog Naushad to convey that compared to his composition, the creativity of Naushad was like the barking of a dog.

Suraiya’s rendering is mint quality and in full character. And she said to me once that she was not a singer. She became singer because it was the demand of the forties. I think Suraiyas’s place is very unique in the Indian film music notwithstanding the Tsunami of Lata.

The song number 10 is last but not the least in this article. There are thousands of more songs that are very alluring.

10. Pyaar hua iqaraar hua by Manna Dey and Lata Mangeshkar from Shri 420 (1955), lyrics Shailendra, music Shankar-Jaikishan

प्यार हुआ इक़रार हुआ है
प्यार से फिर क्यों डरता है दिल
(कहता है दिल, रस्ता मुश्किल
मालूम नहीं है कहाँ मंज़िल ) – २
प्यार हुआ इक़रार हुआ …

दिल कहे इस मांग को, मैं तारों से संवार दूँ
तुमसे नया संसार लूँ, तुमको नया संसार दूँ
चाँद और सूरज, दीप गगन के
इस धरती पे उतार दूँ
आहा हा आहा हा, आ …
प्यार हुआ इक़रार हुआ …

रातों दसों दिशाओं से, कहेंगी अपनी कहानियाँ
प्रीत हमारे प्यार की, दोहराएंगी जवानियाँ
मैं न रहूँगी, तुम न रहोगे
फिर भी रहेंगी निशानियाँ
आहा हा आहा हा, आ …
प्यार हुआ इक़रार हुआ …

This very cleverly crafted song by Shailendra shows the uncertainty of being in love. There is a lot of assurances in the male voice, but still the female is unsure. SJ has great melody and the voices are suited to the characters. Raj Kapoor got Acharekar to do the huge stage design like the scene in the film Singing in the Rain. Those were the days when RK and his team worked so well together to produce great art work. But the film had long shadow of Nargis being thrown out of the RK team and the uncertainty in the song comes alive.

That’s it my work is done. I hope readers will find information, education, and entertainment in plenty here.

{ 26 comments… read them below or add one }

1 C.P.Rajagopalan February 14, 2017 at 6:23 am

Great to start Valentine’s day with such a lovely article. Kudos to AK for thinking of this subject and to Shalan for impeccable execution. Awesome research has gone into this write-up. Just to add to the bit on ’50 shades of grey’, the film had also been made and a sequel is also being shot. No comments on Shalan’s selection of songs, as I do not recall many of them. Since there are thousands of Love songs to choose from, no two peoples’ choice would be the same. To me, ‘Yeh mera prempatra padhkar’ would be an automatic choice as a love anthem. To each his own, I suppose. Thanks once again, AK and Shalan, for this wonderful piece!

2 AK February 14, 2017 at 8:43 am

Raj,
Thanks a lot for your appreciation. However, the entire credit for this post must go to Shalan Lal.

3 D P Rangan February 14, 2017 at 12:14 pm

What an article. My head is simply swimming after reading it. I may have to read it a few more times before it is fully digested. Your earlier two articles were also of the same type. You have taken the bull by the horns and shaken the male bastion to an incredible extent. Surprised you have not included some comments on Lolita by Emily Zola. Another is of Marquis de Sade from which the word sadism is derived. Were there any films on Casanova. I am rehearing the first song posted after more than 30 years. It is still haunting. The video part seems to be from the film Tarana – nainuhue baware by Talat and Lata. Please accept my congratulations on such a well researched and thoughtout post. Expect more wonders from you.

4 mumbaikar8 February 14, 2017 at 1:42 pm

Shalan Lal, AK,
Happy Valentine’s Day to SOY family.
Indeed thought provoking article, an article that ought to be read more than once to digest.
I cannot imagine how much effort was involved in compiling it.
It is depicting the dark origin of Valentine’s Day, but the Valentine‘s day in present time is all for Love and Romance.
My opinion not the day to think about that “dark shade” of Pyaar. December 16th more appropriate date.
My old school definition of love in Gulzar’s words
Hum ne dekhi hai from Khamoshi
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hOQsE47HY7c

5 RSR February 14, 2017 at 4:42 pm

Absolutely TOP CLASS article!… My appreciation has nothing to do with Valentine stuff. . Nor with the old Hollywood Films and recent English books and plays. I do not know much about them. 1)I think, Paul Gaugin was such a character . Decades back (five decades) I had read Maugham’s ‘Moon and Six pence’. The Tahitian girl whom he treats cruelly is madly in love with him and serves him faithfully. 2) James Hadley Chase, was an English novelist . who wrote mainly about the cruel and criminal America of pre-Second world war years. Even Wodehouse, wrote like a Red about the Yanks in PSmith, Journalist. Chase was a pen-name and I think, even today, his real name is not known. . Despite the gory details about the life of the American underworld, Chase novels thrilled us by the unexpected twists and turns. They were not detective novels but bitter attack on yankee culture. Invariably, he shows that Evil, for all its apparent success , ultimately is punished. I would recommend his classic ‘CADE’. .. We had a ‘Chase book club’ and read them religiously. not less than 40 great novels. . though ‘high brows’ would rather swoon on Dmitri. 3) Emily Bronte’s Wuthering Heights is not about sadism. Heathcliffe is passionately in love with Catherine. ‘I can excuse people who ill treat me but not those who torture you’. sums up his violent acts. 4) Jane Eyre is not about Feminist theme either. The life of Bronte Sisters is really tragic. Emily who wrote so passionately about Romance died very young and had absolutely no ‘love’ as it is understood now. ! It was all her imagination, all the more remarkable that it came from a severely secluded life. Maugham has included it in his selection of Ten Greatest novels. . 5) The reference to Balraj Sahni song in SEEMA is confusing. It would have been a masterpiece if it had not brought unlikely romance of Nutan for his benefactor, old enough to be his father! …. and a ‘happy’ ending. 6) The Best love stories , no violence, no viciousness, no tragedy, are by the Bard!… Merchant of Venice, As you like it, Twelfth Night and Comedy of Errors. and most if not all the novels of PGWodehouse. especially his Golf stories. .Heart of a Goof. . All the Romantic comedy films of Tony Crtis and Janet Leigh. Delightful films. like The Perfect Furlough Just some instant jottings …… . A great article. by Lal. one of the Best that I have read . Thank you.

6 RSR February 14, 2017 at 5:58 pm

DPRangan has got confused with Lolita. It was by Nebakov. He has in mind Nana of Zola. but the tormentor in Nana is Nana herself! .. As for ‘Simone’s book, I remember..’ The basis of a mother’s love for the baby is the realization ‘ how totally , the child is dependent on me’. Many marriage counselors are advising that husbands love a wife who is at least seemingly ‘dependent ‘ on them as a child on its mother. It is not male chauvinism but all love is partly , protective affection. This makes them care more. and brings out the ‘father’ in them. Not that they admire dull wives. but bright but docile. Most divorce cases are due to ‘self-willed’ wives. Bad psychology , ‘not to stoop to conquer’. The last passage in the Bard’s ‘Taming of the shrew’, the advice by the Kate “Thy husband is thy lord, thy life, thy keeper,Thy head, thy sovereign, one that cares for thee. ” is true even today. ! Women’s lib is not tutoring the young generation correctly and is ruining many lives.

7 SSW February 14, 2017 at 10:31 pm

Ms. Lal, your post is interesting

I have not read 50 Shades of grey.
I found the title mathematically untrue.
In my world shades of grey,
can only be in powers of two.
So if bits are 8 it is 256
or if 16 then 65,536.
I blandish no orchids
for James Hadley Chase
I found his books sordid
I will now rest my case. 🙂

But I like this song by Rodgers and Hart
it has interesting lyrics

Is your figure less than Greek?
Is your mouth a little weak?
When you open it to speak
Are you smart?

and here is the first lady of Jazz singing it ,
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UjuaZDdqmCw

8 Ashok M Vaishnav February 15, 2017 at 4:12 am

Congratulations to Ms. Shalan Lal for so expressively picking up Subodh Agarwal’s gauntlet and rewarding all of us with so much of food for thought.
With such an elaborate discourse on shades of grey, it is not going to be anymore easy to pick up more of those shades form pyaar songs.
Pyar has the strength to grow flowers in the thorns, makes the young ones span over the earth as sky… this is one formula which applies equally to all….

https://youtu.be/UNoAnkbCmnc

9 RSR February 15, 2017 at 7:13 am

why so scrupulously avoiding Lata , ji? Especially a great song from Jailor ( Madan Mohan). ?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IXQY5otyhJ8
a liberal translation would be most welcome. Any one?

10 KB February 15, 2017 at 9:46 am

Good write up and selection of songs

11 Subodh Agrawal February 15, 2017 at 10:11 am

Ms Shalan Lal, profuse thanks for taking up my suggestion and rewarding us with such a learned, wonderfully researched article. Further kudos to you for realizing that this discussion could leave the readers somewhat disturbed, and setting the balance right with a great selection of ‘pyaar’ songs.

I think a lot about the attractiveness of the supposedly non-attractive things: our taste for coffee, chocolates and alcohol despite the bitterness; popularity of tragedy and horror in literature and films; the high that some people get from flirting with danger. I am one of those who believe that not only our bodies, but our minds, personalities and social behaviour are also shaped by evolution – those characteristics survive and spread which help the organism procreate more successfully.

So why should flirting with danger be so appealing? One would expect that those who flirt with danger would die early and their genes would die with them. The best answer that I have come across is that in some society the thrill seeking gene in men was developed along side a gene among women that made thrill seeking men attractive as mates, balancing the high mortality of thrill seekers by a higher number of children to carry on the genes. These tribes, clans or societies proved to be more successful as they could count on a steady supply of soldiers, adventurers and people who would push the frontiers. Being more adventures in matters of mating and less bound by societal restraints is a part of being a thrill seeker. This is perhaps the reason for women’s preference for bad boys. The game starts early, when mothers develop a special fondness for naughty sons – Kanhaiya being the prime example.

My apologies for this dry diversion into evolution. Thanks once again for the post and the songs.

12 Subodh Agrawal February 15, 2017 at 10:22 am

I spent a year on training in France. Women’s love for bad men is a recurring theme in French songs. One very famous song that I like a lot is ‘Mon Amant de St Jean’. I give below a rough translation of some lines:

‘How not to lose ones heart when held by those audacious arms
For one always believes words of love when they are spoken with the eyes.’

‘Without thinking I gave him the best of myself
Him with the sweet tongue, I knew he was lying
But I loved him.’

‘But alas at St Jean, as elsewhere, a promise is only a lure
I was stupid to believe in happiness and to want to rule his heart.’

‘I, who loved him so much, my beau, my lover of St Jean
He loves me no more, that’s over, let’s not talk of it any more.’

Here is the link to this song. It was used in the background during the titles of Francois Truffaut’s famous film ‘Le Dernier Metro:’

https://youtu.be/93_pv-XWHpQ

13 ksbhatia February 15, 2017 at 11:28 am

Subodh Agrawal ji,

Liked your observations and comments . Ms. Shalan Lal this time has come up with some exhaustive and heavy dose which I think we were not prepared for . Needs to study deeply .

The shades of grey , that lies in between dark black and snow white , are many . The journey of life follows the route in between , looking for bright sun shining colors . Do we take this as distractions ; I don’t know . But who is not distracted by beautiful forms and colors ? ….may be many…..but I will fully endorse your views that one should always be faithful to your own love and live your life as it comes to you , enjoying every moment of it .

Recalling one of the beautiful worded song of the mid 50s…..the lyrics says it all….

Stand by your man ….by Tammy Wynette

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U48VjCJkowE

14 ksbhatia February 15, 2017 at 12:01 pm

Ms.Shalan Lal ;

Carrying on from my views above , I am posting five songs that shows different shades of Love . The common factors among them are ….RK movies , Nargis , Lata , Shankar Jaikishan .

Shade 1. …..Declairation of Love….

Mujhe kisi se pyar hogaya….

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q1_zAooc4q0

Shade 2……sensing fear in Love

Jo mein jaanti unke liye….

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=al3gdqrc7N4

Shade 3…..Steady Love going Valentine way….

Dum bhar jo udhar mun phere…..

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i0J4IE7DkuQ

Shade 4……Love betrayed….

Ek bewaffa se pyar kiya…..

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p-N1Ea5jSqI

Shade 5……Love lost…..

Jo mein jaanti unke liye……Sad Version…..

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7yhybAfs6qk

…..to be continued with songs on other heroins…..

15 AK February 16, 2017 at 7:43 am

RSR,
Your comment at #6.
Most divorce cases are due to ‘self-willed’ wives. Bad psychology , ‘not to stoop to conquer’. The last passage in the Bard’s ‘Taming of the shrew’, the advice by the Kate “Thy husband is thy lord, thy life, thy keeper,Thy head, thy sovereign, one that cares for thee. ” is true even today. ! Women’s lib is not tutoring the young generation correctly and is ruining many lives.

Had this come from a Sakshi Maharaj or a mufti from Bareilly, I would have laughed it off. But coming from you, I was surprised. Since you seem to have meant it seriously, a serious response is called for.

Traditionally, our marital harmony was based on an implicit submission by the woman to her Master and Lord, the word for husband was ‘Swami’. The men discussed politics, religion, history and literature. The woman could not join because she was confined to women’s quarters, she could not appear before other men, and in many cases, her own husband, without veil. More importantly, because she was illiterate and ignorant, she could not have her views on anything outside her hearth. At night, when her Swami desired, she had to be available in the bed, by which she was also doing her pious duty of procreation as she carried the seed of life in her sacred womb. She was amply awarded for her infinite kindness and compassion as she was deified as a Devi and Grihlakshmi. Gods also blessed us: यत्र नार्यस्तु पूज्यन्ते रमन्ते तत्र देवता:.

This ‘equilibrium’ was sustained by the umbrella of joint family. All her activities were communal – there were other women around, and they all did the cooking, washing, grinding, knitting, singing together. Even they went to the fields, and eased themeselves huddled together. In this scenario, even if they were unaware that there was something called companionship, or opinions, or they spent their entire life without talking to their husbands, they survived. In our own lifetimes, our grandmothers and great grandmothers lived this kind of life. Would we wish this Shangri La for our daughters? Is this viable now?

Nuclearisation of families is an inevitable process. A woman forced to live the above life with a man under a roof for forty years would become neurotic. It is no one’s case that we have to keep our daughters illiterate. If we educate them, would we wish them to remain a domestic?

I come from a very orthodox, traditional family. But all the girls in my extended family, and there are about a dozen of them, are studying for a professional career. They are fiercely independent, they would choose who they want to marry. They might allow the parents to do the preliminary work, but they would vet and approve. If it turns out that the man is not liberal in his thoughts, is intolerant, and does not treat them with respect, they might decide not to suffer and demean themselves, and break free. This change is happening all around us, even in traditional middle class or lower middle class families.

There is something to rejoice at women empowerment which is happening in our country. We still have a long way to go to start treating women as intelligent and equal human beings, and not as objects.

If you meant your comment in a lighter vein, please treat my response as scrapped.

16 RSR February 16, 2017 at 11:16 am

To Sri.AK, Thank you for your response. Lal’s article was very scholarly , actually more on literature than on film songs! and I would not trifle with it by offering trivial comments in light vein. I too come from a very orthodox and renowned family. and have personal experience of some gloriously happy arranged marriages as well as terrible hell of ‘love’ marriages. May I add, the latter are more frequent? It is a well-known fact that there has been an alarming rise in divorce cases in Tamilnad . ( mostly from the girls, especially ,those employed in IT field). Lal has spoken of our national classics We had ‘Swayamvaram’ in olden days too.. Marital bliss is a matter of pure chance or for believers like me ‘God’s Grace’. Loyalty comes not by ‘reasoning’ but by ‘culture and training. Without loyalty, marriage is a farce. Human mind is fickle. those with arranged marriage are not less happy than those who preferred to defy their parents .And after all the tumult dies down, the girls feel, it was not at all worth all the trouble.! My advice to all has been that unlike the West, our family system gives more importance to girls than boys. Even when the girls are employed, there is no escape from dowry system. There are many advantages in living with in-laws, for both the girls and parents. especially in the matter of sharing household chores and care of children. Many middle class parents spend their entire earnings and savings on their daughters than on the sons.and even face ruin. By all means, let the new generation of girls equip themselves with proper professional education and means of self-reliance. But let neither the boys nor girls, expect too much from marital life, to be absolutely smooth. Ego clashes are inevitable. even in nuclear family. It requires breeding, culture and training to really benefit from freedom. Above all else, a sense of humour. How adorable such couples are who have a thousand ‘personal’ jokes about the people in their circle and know how to laugh heartily! Such a happy family has happy children too. If the groom chosen by the parents are unsuitable, ( very often, unfortunately, they are, as based on caste and such considerations and mere financial status), you can rebel but it is safer to abide by family guidance . Have a smooth life of understanding, peace and loyalty. Read good books…especially… almost all the classics by George Elliot. ( which deals exactly with these problems ). Do not miss (in this order) a) Adam Bede b) Felix Holt the radical c) MiddleMarch and d) Mill on the Floss.. And there are some delightful family scenes in Dickens . My observation about atleast ‘feigning’ has very deep physiological significance. which I feel would not be ‘proper’ in this forum. . Hardy’s Tess will educate us about being ‘loyal’. This is a dangerous minefield and I am no less a supporter of Justice to Women in society. Sure.. you have seen Hrishi da’s Anuradaha.. a classic starring Balraj and that angelic beauty Leela Naidu. And there are scores of such ,working in ISRO as scientists and research workers. Doubtless you have heard about Tessy Thomas. ( the Missile woman). We need a lot more mathematicians, scientists, technologists, bureaucrats, industrialists , educators, social workers like Medha Phadkar… and less of mere singers, dancers, media dolls, actresses and such. .. In continuation of my earlier ‘comments essay’ on MS, she epitomizes what freedom means to a woman of culture. This is a very serious topic and Lal herself I think, in on my side, She is just pointing out that ‘Pyar’ means different things to different people and is not taking sides. .. Fortunately, our old films always took the side of woman and brought out the injustice meted out to them . Sydney Carton entered the guillotine for a girl who did not even know that he existed . but today’s ‘rowdy lovers’ think nothing of throwing acid on the girl whom they ‘love’. With such change in social mores and mindset of ‘masculinity’ , I am just cautioning the youngsters. . Marital life is not all about physical needs alone. It is a social contract. Try your best to make it work by give and take. Above all else, let marital life be guided by finer values, As Lal seems to be familiar with Bengali classics, I am having in mind characters like Shanthi in Anandhamutt of Bankim and Barathi of Sarath’s Pather Dhabi and real life revolutionaries like Preethilatha Waddedhar and Mrs Bagawathi Charan Wohra (Durga Didi). and something outside the self. some common and noble social aim to unite the couple. In closing I invite Lal and all serious readers to read the following classic.
https://www.marxists.org/archive/shibdas-ghosh/1970/x01/x01.htm
That should set at rest, your query if I am a ‘moulvi’ or ‘sasthri’. No Sir.Neither.

17 AK February 16, 2017 at 12:07 pm

Mr Ramaswamy (RSR),
We are obviously coming from different worlds. Some of your observations are alien to me. Just to pick one “Even when the girls are employed, there is no escape from dowry system.” It is not clear where you are on this. If it is there, is it something desirable and justified, or something inevitable that we have to accept, or a blot on our society to be ashamed of? I am seeing so many marriages in my family and around me where the boy and the girl’s families share the expenses, and often the boy’s family ends up spending more. It is such positive trends that have to be reinforced.

For every point there would be a counterpoint which can be argued with vehemence, with examples, generalisations and sources from classic literatures and scriptures. Therefore, it is best that we let it rest. SoY is about songs, and I have stated several times that this is not a forum for discussing complex political and social issues. Shalan Lal and the readers have posted some outstanding songs.

18 RSR February 16, 2017 at 2:23 pm

Sri.A.K, .. Yes, indeed. We come from different environments. I am not justifying the ‘dowry ‘ system. I have read all the old books mentioned by Lal. and some more. I offered how those books are viewed in orthodox literary circles. albeit pre 1960. To really appreciate my points, one should have read the books mentioned by me.. not at all obscure but accepted classics. I do agree that this is not the forum. for literary discussion. I would particularly request readers familiar with Sarath Chandra novels, to read in depth, the classic article by Sibdas Ghosh… Thank you.

19 Ashwin Bhandarkar February 16, 2017 at 3:07 pm

The universe of women can be represented by a venn diagram consisting of two non-intersecting circles representing the following two disjoint sets:

1. Women who fall for the beimaan/zulmi/dagaabaaz types

2. Women who prefer the anaadi/naadaan types.

My hypothesis is that the cardinal numbers for both sets are very close to each other in value.

Here are 3 film songs in which the heroine is head-over-heels in love with her naadaan/anaadi baalam:

1. Balma bada naadaan re from Albela –

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HC5QQCEKWTI

2. Balma anaadi man bhaaye from Bahurani –

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m6doOa6A9g8

3. Woh chaand khila, woh taar hanse from Anaadi –

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OvtU5FYxK-c

One more song about the naive lover; the character singing the song is not the heroine though:

Mora naadann baalma na jaane dil ki baat from Ujaala –

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EtGOPPc66Z4

20 RSR February 16, 2017 at 4:33 pm

Ashwin Bhandarkar: Thank you. All are very sweet songs by Lataji.
———-
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v57QxIkF3nI

this lovely song and scene says it all.

21 Ashwin Bhandarkar February 16, 2017 at 4:59 pm

Here’s one more on the naadaan baalam:

Baalamwa naadaan from Aaraam:

https://youtu.be/1ejND4emOBU

22 Ashwin Bhandarkar February 16, 2017 at 6:07 pm

1936 was the year of the Berlin Olympics and the year of the Abdication, with King Edward VIII abdicating the throne so that he could marry his lover – Mrs.Wallis Simpson, an American divorcee. Here is a Harry Belafonte song from his album ‘ Belafonte sings of the Carribbean’ that has the Abdication as its topic. Its refrain is

‘It was love, love alone
Caused King Edward to leave his throne’

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SJaYy7QY9nQ

To me, the lyrics sound more satirical than sounding like a paean to love.

By the way, the drama and the intrigues around the Abdication have been dramatized very well in the Netflix original series titled ‘The Crown’, the first season of which concluded last November.

23 Ashwin Bhandarkar February 16, 2017 at 6:37 pm

Here is a song, which is slightly ‘hatke’ by Hindi movie standards – the heroine avers that she does not love the hero after all:

‘Tumhe ho na ho, mujhlo to itna yakeen hai
Ki mujhe pyaar tumse nahin haim nahin hai’

(from Gharaonda)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AZXSBVWQ8wo

The song above brought to mind ‘Believe’, the Cher classic, in which a jilted woman declares that she is strong enough to move on but does not believe that her ex has it in him to do the same:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=safkWMNJdDg

And here’s Nancy Sinatra, in more or less a similar situation, but in a much more belligerent mood:

‘These boots are made for walkin”:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SbyAZQ45uww

24 Ashwin Bhandarkar February 16, 2017 at 6:49 pm

If “Saraswatichandra” had been made in the early 30s, and if Queen Mary had understood Hindi and had watched the film, she just might have paraphrased the mukhda of this song as follows, and sung it to her eldest son. Who knows, he might have listened and history would have taken a different course.

“Chhod de sinhaasan kisi ke liye
Ye munaasib nahin ek raja ke liye”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FFW6dBHPcTo

25 ksbhatia February 17, 2017 at 2:46 pm

Ashwin ji ;

Interesting deviation and Nice sub -topic songs covering naadaan/ anaadi / beimaan .

Continuing the shades of songs from #14 , this time with different heroins. Lata is the common factor.

6.Hum se na poochho koi pyar kya hai….Lata….Kali Ghata….SJ

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nyV5FME2lzQ

7.Unse pyar ho gaya….Lata…Badal….SJ

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9fZJu5gXHSE

8.Dil dhadke nazar sharmaye….Lata….Albela…CR

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EO9MW1A8dAM

9.Tera mera pyar amar….Lata….Asli Naqli….SJ

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hP0fThpw80c

10.Tu pyar kare ya na kare….Lata…Dekh Kabira Roiya….MM

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5VCpTu4Q0fE

11. Hum pyar mein jitna…Lata…Daku ki Ladki….Hemant

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A6BOAulvTCU

12.Tootegi na pyar ki dor….Lata…Amber….Ghulam . Mohd.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fgrvQfSZvEg

13.Pyar ki dastan…..Lata….Farrar….Hemant

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pb42lYOfhMU

……to be contd……

26 ksbhatia February 17, 2017 at 3:12 pm

Ms.Shalan Lal ;

Continuing songs from #25 , a few more but this time some duets.

14.Tum jo aao to pyar aa jaaye…Manna Dey, Suman…Sakhi Robin..Robin

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sey4T0dtO6o

15.aa gaya maja pyar ka nasha….Asha, CR…Sarhad…CR

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AQgxRFIO_XE

16.Zara tumne dekha to pyar…Rafi, Lata….Jaltarang…Husn. Bhagtram

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E0ybKKnkix0

17.Jeet hi lenge baazi hum tum…Rafi, Lata…Shola aur Shabnam…Kym..

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=06hu0QJ_UO8

18.Aa neel gagn tale pyar…Lata, Hemant…Badshah..SJ

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WnOFZw8wElg

19.Main to…Piya ka ghar pyara lage…Lata…Sarswatichandra..KA

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s12QqQ_jA5c

20.Hum pyar karenge….hemant, Lata….Dhun…MM

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vQODcwnsRuI

….to be contd….

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